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Doula dilemma

I'm due to have number 2 in June & have always thought it would be nice to have a doula (although I probably can't afford one).  

For my first birth my husband was an absolute star - massaging me, reminding me to breathe, and encouraging me throughout. He was in the water with me for about 5 hours & was my rock & my calm, I could not have done it without him! My best friend was there too and she was in charge of juice, tea, aromatherapy oils & my homeopathic birthing kit. We had an amazing experience.

This time my husband would like it to be just me & him, but I am worried that he may not be able to cover all bases, but I also don't want him to feel in any way inadequate (because he's not). I remember last time demanding he put his entire body weight on my sacrum through each contraction. If I get a birthing pool will the midwives regulate the water temp & offer me drinks, or do you think it is advisable to get a friend or doula??

CONGRATULATIONS to you all on the birth of your little daughter.

I would advise any woman to meet several doulas during her pregnancy and see if any of them 'feel' right. Doulas vary hugely in cost and you might be surprized to find that many are more affordable than you might imagine. It is advisable to check that the doula is trained and insured, and to find out about how much experience she has, although there are many excellent newly qualified doulas who can be very inexpensive, some charging expenses only, and could be the perfect person for you. Statistics show that birth and breastfeeding outcomes are improved dramatically with a doula. Many couples feel better knowing they have the support of a knowledgable person who is there soley to meet your needs without the demands of protocol and paperwork that a midwife is bound to. Doulas are often very open minded and welcome practices that some midwives may be uncomfortable with, such as lotus birth or exclusive breastfeeding. There are lots of good doulas in Cornwall so consider meeting a few. Often word of mouth is the way to find the right doula for you.


A doula helps fill this gap by providing support to the woman and her partner or support system throughout the childbearing year. A doula does not replace the support system; instead, they help support them so that they can focus on loving and encouraging the laboring woman. Doulas can serve as a source of information during pregnancy, labor and birth. A doula assists families in gathering information about their pregnancy, labor and the options available for delivery.

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